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JMDC #207 - Up to the task
Title: Up to the task
Character: Ianto, Jack
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 525 words
Content notes: None
Summary: Ianto has his misgivings about Jack’s nomination for Corpse Day.
Ianto watched Owen pick up his jacket and head out of the hub, before turning back to Jack, gripping his mug of coffee in front of him as if it might protect him from any backlash from what he would say next. ‘I think it’s a really bad idea to send Owen,’ he said, bracing himself for impact.
Jack barely reacted to the judgement of his decision. ‘You think so?’ he said, as if Ianto had merely commented on the likelihood of rain, rather than his executive decisions making abilities. Not that Ianto himself was keen to go in Owen’s stead. There were some aspects of Torchwood’s day to day that even he railed against.
Ianto inferred safety from the calm response and took a step further forward towards the desk. ‘It’s Corpse Day. The one day of the year that Torchwood has to be nice to Cardiff Metropolitan Police, helping them to perhaps solve one of their unsolved case files. Do you really think Owen is the best person to do that?’
Owen could scarcely be relied upon to be nice to his fellow teammates some days. Lord knew how he was going to manage some disbelieving, wet behind the ears, police constable. Most of them didn’t even believe in alien intervention when it was happening right in front of them. Corpse Day ultimately always ended up in someone being retconned. Usually the police officer in question. And that was even assuming whichever unsolved case file they pulled had anything at all to do with aliens in the first place. Some years it was a totally pointless exercise, which usually resulted in them having to find something alien just to fill in their mandated requirement.
‘I actually chose Owen for a reason, you know,’ Jack replied, leaning his elbows on the desk.
Ianto sighed. ‘Please tell me this wasn’t one of your poor taste jokes.’ Sending a corpse to handle Corpse Day was cruel, even for Jack, and really not the last bit funny, no matter how you looked at it. It wasn’t Owen’s fault he was now technically dead, even if he was still walking and talking.
‘Ianto, you wound me,’ Jack said, clutching his chest. ‘In fact, I sent Owen for two completely separate and legitimate reasons. One,’ he began, visually counting it off on his hand, ‘it’ll give him something to do for the day. In case you hadn’t noticed, our caseload has been light these past few weeks, and there’s nothing worse than a bored Owen Harper getting on my wick.’
Ianto couldn't necessarily disagree with that. ‘Or anybody else's,’ he added ‘And the second reason?’
Jack’s face broke out into a grin. ‘With luck, he might be so obnoxious that we never have to host another Corpse Day ever again.’ Jack looked proud of himself for having thought that up.
Ianto took a sip of his coffee and kept his expression neutral. ‘Very good, sir.’ Not that he believed it would work for a second. If Cardiff’s constabulary had put up with Jack partnering them for Corpse Day all these years, then nothing was going to put them off.
Ianto watched Owen pick up his jacket and head out of the hub, before turning back to Jack, gripping his mug of coffee in front of him as if it might protect him from any backlash from what he would say next. ‘I think it’s a really bad idea to send Owen,’ he said, bracing himself for impact.
Jack barely reacted to the judgement of his decision. ‘You think so?’ he said, as if Ianto had merely commented on the likelihood of rain, rather than his executive decisions making abilities. Not that Ianto himself was keen to go in Owen’s stead. There were some aspects of Torchwood’s day to day that even he railed against.
Ianto inferred safety from the calm response and took a step further forward towards the desk. ‘It’s Corpse Day. The one day of the year that Torchwood has to be nice to Cardiff Metropolitan Police, helping them to perhaps solve one of their unsolved case files. Do you really think Owen is the best person to do that?’
Owen could scarcely be relied upon to be nice to his fellow teammates some days. Lord knew how he was going to manage some disbelieving, wet behind the ears, police constable. Most of them didn’t even believe in alien intervention when it was happening right in front of them. Corpse Day ultimately always ended up in someone being retconned. Usually the police officer in question. And that was even assuming whichever unsolved case file they pulled had anything at all to do with aliens in the first place. Some years it was a totally pointless exercise, which usually resulted in them having to find something alien just to fill in their mandated requirement.
‘I actually chose Owen for a reason, you know,’ Jack replied, leaning his elbows on the desk.
Ianto sighed. ‘Please tell me this wasn’t one of your poor taste jokes.’ Sending a corpse to handle Corpse Day was cruel, even for Jack, and really not the last bit funny, no matter how you looked at it. It wasn’t Owen’s fault he was now technically dead, even if he was still walking and talking.
‘Ianto, you wound me,’ Jack said, clutching his chest. ‘In fact, I sent Owen for two completely separate and legitimate reasons. One,’ he began, visually counting it off on his hand, ‘it’ll give him something to do for the day. In case you hadn’t noticed, our caseload has been light these past few weeks, and there’s nothing worse than a bored Owen Harper getting on my wick.’
Ianto couldn't necessarily disagree with that. ‘Or anybody else's,’ he added ‘And the second reason?’
Jack’s face broke out into a grin. ‘With luck, he might be so obnoxious that we never have to host another Corpse Day ever again.’ Jack looked proud of himself for having thought that up.
Ianto took a sip of his coffee and kept his expression neutral. ‘Very good, sir.’ Not that he believed it would work for a second. If Cardiff’s constabulary had put up with Jack partnering them for Corpse Day all these years, then nothing was going to put them off.