Boston Legal: Fanfic: Inappropriate disclosures

[m_findlow]

Title: Inappropriate disclosures
Fandom: Boston Legal
Characters: Denny, Alan, Shirley
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 401 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for debirlfan's prompt "Boston Legal, Denny Crane, Denny tweets inappropriate photos on his new phone" at fic_promptly
Summary: Denny has taken to his new phone like a duck to water.

'Denny! What the hell is this?' came the demand as Shirley brushed into his office, ignoring the fact that Alan was already in there. Honestly did those two ever do any work? She held up the phone and showed him the screen.

'Oh, is that you?' Alan asked, examining the photo and looking back at Denny.

'I love this new phone,' Denny said, 'but the screen just isn't big enough to fit all of it in.'

'There should be a zoom setting,' Alan replied.

'I'm loving it,' Denny said, smiling down at the monstrously large phone screen. 'The resolution is magnificent and I've got all my emails and favourite websites all in one place. How did we ever manage with those old rotary phones, I ask you? How could I, Denny Crane, keep my followers up to date on all of my many achievements without it?'

'Far too numerous to keep up with, I'm sure,' Alan said.

'Ahem,' Shirley cleared her throat again.

'Sorry,' Alan apologised. 'I believe you had a question, Shirley. I see you're following Denny's Twitter feed, though.'

'I don't know how,' Shirley replied, 'since I didn't even know Denny was on Twitter, but this is just...'

'Magnificent isn't it?' Denny asked, beaming with pride. I could have been a professional photographer and never have known it until I bought this baby.'

'Professional...' she let the word drift off, still incredulous. 'Denny, you tweeted pictures of your, your...'

'Sizeable assets,' Alan supplied for her. 'Although I must confess, I would probably have to agree that sharing them on Twitter was probably overstepping the mark.'

'Why?' Denny said, as if the notion of not doing so was unthinkable. 'I've got seven thousand and sixty two followers.' He consulted the phone again. 'No, wait, seven thousand and eighty nine now. This is just the beginning. They're begging for more. Everyone wants more Denny Crane.'

'Denny, you cannot be tweeting pictures like that,' Shirley said. 'They're appalling.'

'Well, I was thinking that the office lighting wasn't really doing me any favours. Makes me look washed out.'

She scoffed again. 'You mean you... did that here?'

'You should have been here twenty minute ago. It was like a proper fashion shoot. Denny Crane, Tiger.'

'If the Bar Association see these, you could be disbarred, Denny. Do you understand that?'

'Don't talk nonsense, Shirley. Chief Justice Applegate was one of my first followers.'