Slashthedrabble Challenge 614 - Killing time

[m_findlow]

Title: Killing time
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Ianto, Jack
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 500 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for Challenge 614 - Tunnel at slashthedrabble
Summary: Jack has a few ideas about how to make being stuck in a traffic jam more enjoyable.

'I thought this new undersea tunnel between Cardiff and Bristol was supposed to make the journey shorter,' Jack complained, leaning forward to figure out how many miles of cars were banked up in front of them. It was a pointless exercise since the tunnel curved and hid most of them from view.

'It is making the journey shorter,' Ianto replied. 'No more having to drive through Newport. I know how much you love the M4.'

'And yet we're still stuck in a massive traffic jam.'

'Yes, but this traffic jam is only going to have us stuck for an hour instead of the usual two and a half.'

Jack huffed. 'From now on you guys get to do all the driving out of Cardiff. I'll happily stay local and put up with the one way system around town.'

Ianto smirked. 'Can I get that in writing, or do I need Tosh to pull the audio recorders from the SUV's motherboard and have it uploaded and broadcast around the hub?'

'Funny,' Jack said, sulking back down into the passenger seat. 'We can't even get radio reception,' he complained, twiddling the dial but getting nothing but static. 'How are we supposed to stay in contact with the hub if we can't even get a radio signal?'

'We have our phones,' Ianto reminded him. 'The SUV is perfectly capable of picking up any transmission from the hub.'

'Just not Red Dragon FM.'

'There are worse things.'

'Where did all these people come from anyway? It's like a mass exodus from Wales.'

'Brand new underground tunnel linking the country to Cornwall. Everyone wants to see what it's all about. And they've waived the tolls for the first week.'

'Cheapskates.' Jack gazed at the overhead speed signs. They read forty miles but right now they weren't even doing four miles. They'd hardly moved four inches. Jack tapped his earpiece. 'Tosh, any news why there's such a hold up in the new Severn tunnel?'

He could hear the click of her keys. 'Seems to be a glitch in their traffic management computer system. It keeps telling people that the lanes are closed. I think you might be there a while.'

'How long?'

'Well, let me put it this way. I won't be ordering a third pizza tonight.'

'Great. Thanks, Tosh.' He tore his earpiece away and dropped it into the cup holder. 'Looks like we've got a lot of time to kill.'

'Eye Spy?'

'I was thinking something requiring less clothes. Stick that thing in park and come join me,' Jack said, already squeezing into the back seat.

'No way. We're surrounded by people in cars. I don't care how tinted you think these windows are.'

Just then all the overhead lights in the tunnel flickered out and they were in darkness apart from a few dim patches lit by headlights from cars behind and in front.

Jack grabbed him by his tie, dragging him backwards. 'You were staying? Just remember. We could be here hours.'