Torchwood: Fanfic: All in white

[m_findlow]

Title: All in white
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 700 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for m_findlow's prompt "Any, any, "because white's just so boring"" at fic_promptly
Summary: Painting isn't nearly as fun as it sounds

Jack ran the back of his hand across his brow before realising that he'd accidentally striped himself. He dropped the roller back in the tray, the impact splattering more drops of white across his shoe. He'd been bored with the task four hours ago. Looking around the room, he realised he wasn't even halfway done, and the roof was completely untouched.

He trudged across the room, hearing the plastic sheeting crackling under his feet until he reached the hall. He caught his reflection in the hallway mirror, the large white stripe making itself prominent under his hairline, streaking all the way across his forehead. It wasn't nearly so bad as the grey coveralls he was forced to wear, mishapen, baggy and very, very unflattering. If getting paint on his clothes was an issue, he couldn't understand why he wasn't allowed to paint without clothes at all. It was how he'd would have done it, but as usual, the voice of reason - one Ianto Jones - had somehow convinced, or perhaps coerced, him into these drab, shapeless garments.

He stepped into the kitchen, spotting Ianto on a step ladder, reaching up into the top corner with his roller. Even he couldn't pull off sexy in those things, Jack thought, struggling to imagine the familiar shapley outline now hidden.

'Hey,' Jack said, making sure not to startle him. the last thing he wanted was to send Ianto tumbling off the ladder. He might be there to catch him, but they'd both be covered in half a tin of something described as "Berkshire White".

'All done with the living room?' Ianto asked.

Jack scoffed. 'Hardly.'

Ianto turned around and looked at him. 'Well, maybe if you spent less time painting yourself and more time painting the walls?' he suggested.

'You can talk,' Jack replied, seeing the spot of white on the tip of Ianto's nose and pointing at it.

'It was itchy.'

'So was my forehead. Remind me again why we couldn't just pay someone to do this?'

'You're the one who didn't want to do the place up in the first place. If you want to get some serious interest, you're going to have to get it up to date.'

'Not my fault all those people were so damn picky,' he said, remembering all the disparaging comments from their open house inspection two weeks prior.

'Face it, Jack. This might have been all the fashion back in the seventies, but no one can live with mustard, olive and tangerine coloured walls.'

Jack sighed. 'Yeah, okay fair enough. It's a bit outdated,' he agreed, 'but do we have to paint the whole thing white?'

'What's wrong with white? And more to the point, what makes you think someone else is going to approve of whatever colour choices you make?'

'Because... Because white's just so boring!'

Ianto set his roller gently down in the tray. 'Ourhouse is white. Are you telling me you'd prefer a technicolor explosion?'

'Well, maybe not every room,' Jack conceded. The tangerine kitchen was a bit much on the eyes. He wouldn't mind a deep red for their bedroom though.

'You know I put up wallpaper once,' Jack said. He chuckled. 'Bright yellow and black baroque. Now that was a bachelor pad! I wonder if it's still there? It was in Ely, somewhere near the river.'

'Wellright Road?' Ianto asked.

'That's it. How'd you know?'

'You still own it. I had some contractors come and remove it about eighteen months ago. That was the most God awful wallpaper I've ever seen. I thought you must have lost your mind buying a place like that. I should've known only you could pick out something so ghastly.'

'I thought it looked trendy.'

'And this is why I'm never letting you decorate our house. It's white, or nothing. Now, back to it,' he said, ordering Jack off with the end of his roller brush. 'This place won't paint itself.'

'It's boring,' Jack said, referring to both the colour and the task itself. 'Can't I at least do it naked? These overalls suck.'

'Well, you could, but then how would I reward you once you're finished?'

Ianto had never seen Jack disappear so fast.

Comments

[bk_forever]

Ianto is the king of manipulation when it comes to Jack!

I agree though, everywhere white just hurts my eyes, and there's nothing wrong with breaking up the plainness with the odd splash of colour. For seling a house though, I've heard white is best.