Anythingdrabble Challenge 20 - Leaving a bitter taste

[m_findlow]

Title: Leaving a bitter taste
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: Jack, Ianto
Word Count: 500 words
Rating: PG
Notes: Written for Challenge 20 - Acidic at anythingdrabble
Summary: Jack just wanted to spoil Ianto with the finer things in life.

'You have to try this, Ianto,' Jack said, looking like a kid in a candy store as he held the bottle aloft.

'What is that?'

Jack sighed dramatically. 'What does it look it?'

'Alien moonshine,' Ianto said, eyeing off the lime green bottle. 'Please tell me that didn't just fall through the rift.'

Jack gave another sigh. 'I know how you feel about ingesting anything that has travelled through space and time, but I really have to insist.'

Ianto leaned back in his chair and considered Jack thoughtfully. Jack insisting on anything was never a good sign. 'I've heard plenty of your stories about getting horrendously drunk on one thing or another and waking up three days later after having had sex with half the population. I really don't think it's advisable to add Cardiff to your already impressive little black book.'

Jack perched on the edge of the desk and set the bottle down. 'It's not like that. Imagine the most expensive bottle of wine you can think of.'

'Okay.'

'Now times that by ten.'

'So, it's wine? Just really expensive wine.'

'Calling it wine isn't exactly correct, but it is manufactured from fruit.'

'Cider, perry, tepache,' Ianto rattled off.

'For arguments sake, let's call it wine.'

'So glad we resolved that.'

'I was thinking maybe we could sample it over dinner?' Jack asked, sounding hopeful.

'You bring the wine and I end up having to cook? You're not really selling it.'

'I'll pick us up some food on the way home. Maybe some of those Malaysian curries and that salad they do? Then all you have to do is sit back and relax.'

'Now you're talking.'

 

It wasn't often Jack offered to treat Ianto to a night off kitchen duties, so that much at least was a bonus. He eyed off the bottle Jack had sent home with him, chilling in the fridge. Perhaps he shouldn't be so skeptical. There were surely other planets out there that drank wine and similar things. It might be really good.

Jack arrived home laden with food, before taking the bottle and popping it open, letting it breathe for a few minutes whilst Ianto broke open the lid off the containers of food, pouring them into serving bowls. It always felt nicer than eating straight out of the plastic. He watched as Jack filled two tall glasses and passed him one. 'Here's cheers.'

'Iechyd da.'

He nearly spat it out as soon as it hit his taste buds. It was like sucking on the world's most acidic lemon. He touched his tongue to make sure it hadn't melted off in the process.

'What the hell is that?'

Jack sipped before gagging. 'Oh! That's just... so sour!'

'It's not meant to taste like that?'

'Definitely not. I think maybe it's off.'

'And this is why we never consume anything that comes through the rift,' Ianto lectured. 'Next time you want to treat me, just buy us a nice bottle of Earth wine, yeah?'

Comments

[jo02]

I know, I know, I was just passing by when you posted this.

Ianto really should know by now to let Jack taste-test these things and if he's still alive and coherent in half an hour then maybe Ianto can try some.

[m-findlow.livejournal.com]

He likes to give the benefit of the doubt, and who knew alcohol went off? It should have been a very fine vintage but for that.

[love-jackianto.livejournal.com]

Poor Ianto

[bk_forever]

Who knows how long it's been bouncing around through the Rift? Obviously it doesn't travel well. They should just crack open a couple of beers and sit down with their curries to wash the sour taste away.