m_findlow

Title: Heaven sent
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 821 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for lucathia’s prompt "Any, any, I thought you had died" at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack knows that death is not always final for him, but those he loves face an uncertain future.

Jack heaved in the lung full of air. After all this time he should be used to coming back to life, but lately it's been different. He's not just coming back to life, he's coming back to a life. His life. The one with Torchwood and Cardiff and Gwen. And most importantly, the one with Ianto Jones.

He's become accustomed to Ianto being there when he comes back to life. He's become used to the solid warmth of the arms that wrap around him protectively and reassure him that he's safe. He never thought he'd be so glad to have someone else there when he came back. Prior to that it had always been incredibly awkward for anyone who had to bear witness to it. And he didn't really want them to witness it. Apart from the fact that it must have been terribly disturbing for the person having to watch it happen, it was the way he felt, as if it changed the way they viewed him. It wasn't natural for someone to come back from death. He was a freak. He was wrong. He hated other people seeing that in him.

But then along had come Ianto Jones, who took it all in his stride, or at least made it look like he took it all in his stride. In truth, Jack knew it upset the young man, watching him die. But it just went to show that love was more powerful than any freakish act of impossibility. Love saw past the horror and the heartache. Now he could hardly bear coming back without that steadfast embrace surrounding him.

That's what hit him hardest when he awoke. Ianto wasn't here. Wherever here was. Then he remembered what had happened.

The 456 had poisoned them, sealing them inside, and trying to kill everyone in the building. Jack had panicked. It wasn't supposed to go down like this. And now his lover's life was in peril. It was all happening way too fast. Before he knew it, Ianto was on his knees, already succumbing to the deadly poison. No, his mind screamed. This was not how it was going to end. He began to breathe into Ianto's lungs, forcing pure, clean air into his body. He could feel his own body struggling to fight off the virus, the vortex inside him battling to preserve his fixed point in time. It gave him the advantage he thought he needed. He ignored his own needs, forcing life into his dying lover. He had no idea if it was working, but still he kept on going. The price of failure was too high to stop now. On and on he went, even as he felt his body losing its fight against the virus. Still Ianto didn't move, didn't open his eyes. Jack sobbed in desperation as his body slumped forward over Ianto's own, and he prayed to Gods he hadn't beseeched in decades.

He sat up, disoriented. There was a red blanket covering his body then he looked around. It was some kind of school gym hall. And there were dozens and dozens of red blankets, lined up in rows and columns. Under each was a long small lump, and he knew what they were. Bodies. If he'd had anything in his stomach, he would have sicked it up right then and there.

Ianto. Where was Ianto?

He turned to the blanketed form next to him. It was about the right height, his detached mind decided. He crawled over to it and slowly pulled back the blanket.

It wasn't Ianto.

He crawled back to the body on his left and did the same.

It wasn't Ianto either.

He stared despairingly at the hall full of bodies, starting to pull back their coverings one by one, becoming more frantic with each failed attempt to find his lover's body so that he could hold him one last time.

'Jack!'

Jack turned at the sound, but his eyes were so streaked with tears that he couldn't make out anything clearly. He resolved it as his grieving mind, creating hallucinations, but he followed the voice regardless, convinced that his spirit must be calling to him, directing him to the correct corpse.

It wasn't until he felt those strong, warm familiar arms wrapped tightly around him that he realised he hadn't imagined it. Ianto was there, holding him. Maybe he finally had died. Maybe this was heaven.

'Ianto?' He still couldn't quite believe this was real.

'I'm here, Jack,' he sobbed. 'I'm so sorry, they wouldn't let me in. They were worried about contamination.'

He held him like the world was ending, and outisde of this room, it probably was.

'I thought you'd died.'

'I thought I'd died too,' he replied shakily.

'I didn't want to come back if you were gone.'

'I didn't want to come back if you were gone, either. You saved me.'

'Always,' Jack promised.