Torchwood: Fanfic: False memory

[m_findlow]

Title: False memory
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 558 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for juliet316’s prompt "any, any, and it feels so good " at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack is disturbed by Ianto's confession

Ianto's expression is wild, like an animal's.

'My hands on her throat. And it felt so good. Squeezing the life out of her.'

It disturbed Jack, making ice run through his veins. There was something very, very wrong with Ianto.

Jack himself had done a lot of cold, heartless things in his long lifetime, but he'd never described enjoyment of any of it in the chilling way Ianto had just done.

He knew Ianto had lied to him before, and had done so convincingly, but this just didn't make any sense. Why would he have done those things, and more importantly how? It just didn't gel with the person he'd come to known. The incredibly caring, self-sacrificing person that he knew. This wasn't the same person. This was like some bizarre Jekyll and Hyde; the villainous murderer and the scared, sobbing bystander.

More perplexing was why Jack was only remembering these things now. He hadn't exactly had the best night himself, having been confronted with the memories of his long lost little brother. But Adam had been there and he'd given Jack the reassurance that it was probably just stress.

That was what he couldn't understand now. He didn't exactly remember taking Adam along with him to the weevil sighting. Hadn't he been at Gwen's flat with Rhys? Hadn't Ianto brought Gwen back once Owen had cleared her medically speaking? Wasn't he the one who alerted Jack to the reports of weevils? He wasn't sure anymore. Maybe he'd imagined it, or maybe Adam had been there the whole time.

It had seemed odd at the time to be admitting his deepest secrets and fears to Adam, but Adam was his best friend. It wasn't until he returned to the hub and found Ianto still there, that he half wondered why he couldn't share those secrets with Ianto. They were sleeping together after all, but it was more than just sex, wasn't it? If Ianto had not come and made his confession to Jack, he would have sat down with him and told him all about Gray. He felt like he owed it to his lover not to withhold any more secrets.

It wasn't until he was holding a frightened Ianto tightly against him, that his earlier confessions to Adam felt wrong, but he couldn't figure out why. His mind felt blurry at the edges, like there was something missing.

That was why he was going to convince Ianto that he hadn't killed those girls. It just wasn't possible. Something must have happened to him. Maybe he'd been possessed or drugged, or maybe he'd just dreamt the whole thing. If Jack felt hazy about his own recollections, and Gwen had lost her memories of Rhys altogether, could it be possible they were all suffering from something? There were a hundred possibilities, but only one held absolute certainty, and that was that Ianto wasn't a killer.

He shouldn't have given up his questioning so quickly. If he hadn't, Ianto might have mentioned Adam. Told him how he had been a willing accomplice. That would have done it. Coupled with his own mind's doubts, they might have figured it out sooner.

Nothing seems right anymore, but Jack knows that despite everything, being there with Ianto in this moment feels right, whatever his mind tries to tell him. His lover is no monster.

Comments

[bk_forever]

It's great to see Jack's perspective on that scene, he had false memories too which is easy to overlook because of the things Ianto was 'remembering'. Adam's hold over Jack must not have been as complete as with the others.

[carinas-carinae.livejournal.com]

Mmm. Love it.