m_findlow

Title: A right mess
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 242 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for lannamichaels's prompt "any, any, leaving behind a mess" at fic_promptly
Summary: Someone will be walking away from this mess, but not who they thought

Jack, disheartened by his lack of progress, gazed at the sullied exterior.

In order to play a practical joke, one often faces the dire consequences of failure, and the subsequent punishment.

The SUV, usually polished within an inch of its life, now a tragically sad figure, stood there encased in grime unimaginable.

‘You’ll not get that off with standard soap’ mutters Ianto, pleased with this new delegation of duties.

‘Where the hell is Owen? He needs to help.’ Jack curses, regretting his own foolishness at landing himself in this mess. And a fine mess indeed.

Slime, devoid of function in the universe, apart from lubrication, seeps along the doorframe and drops onto his shoe, mocking him.

‘Argh!’ he cries, flicking the boot with determination. ‘Never again! I’ll give up sex first!’

He receives a coy smile. ‘Next time, think before you act.’ A sponge hits him in the face, and a bucket of water shortly follows, not aimed at his face, but placed at his feet with almost maniacal glee.

‘Elbow grease, Jack,’ Ianto instructs. ‘Lots and lots of elbow grease.’

‘Just shut up and find Owen!’ he barks, incensed at this turn of events.

Next time, he thinks, such risqué ideas require a more sincere evaluation. Sharing them with mischievous cohorts, an ill-advised idea at the best of times, now proves fatal.

Wet sponge in hand, Jack contemplates his fate, determined to mete out appropriate sanctions to his partner in crime.