m_findlow

Title: Due north
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Suzie, Owen
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 692 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for dark_kana's prompt "Any, any, keep heading north" at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack's directions leave something to be desired

'Okay guys, I've managed to lock onto your comms signal,' Jack said.

Well, that's a relief, 'Suzie said. 'How the hell we were ever supposed to find you out here in the middle of nowhere is anybody's guess,' she said, readjusting her backpack.

'Yeah,' Owen said, 'this is the last time I make house calls,' he puffed, trekking over the hilly terrain. 'Remind me why you came out here on your own again?'

'We've never had a signal this far out in the beacons. It didn't seem worth wasting the entire teams resources on chasing one wild goose.'

'From where I'm standing,' Owen said, 'the only goose around here is you.'

'It's bad country out here, Jack,' Suzie agreed. 'It's not exactly made for a leisurely stroll. The train the British SAS out in these hills. And who in their right mind comes out here in the middle of the night?'

'Yeah, well, it would have been fine if I hadn't slipped on a loose rock. I probably could have made it back to the car.'

'Fat chance,' Owen scoffed. 'Not only have you broken an ankle, it sounds like you've slipped a disc in the process.'

'Do you want me to try sitting up again?'

'No! You stay right where you are before you cause irreparable spinal cord damage!' Owen yelled.

'Alright, alright, no need to yell.'

He lay there on his back feeling ten kinds of stupid. Because he was stubborn, now the rest of the team were trekking halfway across the Brecon Beacons to find him. Hopefully he hadn't done serious damage and they could just walk him out of there. If they had to call in an air ambulance, he'd be mortified.

Pride comes before a fall, Jack, he told himself.

'Oi,' he heard Suzie snap in his ear. 'Which way now?'

He lifted up his wrist and consulted his vortex manipulator. 'Uh, go east for a bit, I'll tell you when to stop.'

'Well at least it's mainly downhill,' she replied. 'You must have been wandering for miles.'

'Maybe,' he mused, staring skyward at the clouds, trying to imagine them into familiar shapes. 'Kinda lost track of time.'

'Kinda lost track of where the bloody hell you were going, more like,' Owen griped.

Owen and Suzie trekked for a good half hour before Jack instructed them to turn north.

'Keep heading north and you'll be right on target,' he said.

'Roger that,' Suzie said. 'You okay there?'

'Yup. Just me and Bugs hanging out.'

'What?'

'Bugs Bunny. He's in the sky.'

Suzie gave Owen a concerned look but he just shook his head and rolled his eyes. 'Probably dehydrated, the stupid twat. And it's Jack. Since when does half of what he says make any sense?'

Twenty minutes later they both came to a halt.

'Which way now, Jack?' Suzie said.

'I told you, keep heading north.'

'We've gone north as far as we can.'

'No you haven't.'

'Uh, yeah we have,' she said, looking around, and seeing nothing but large sheer stone wall blocking their path.

'I'm telling you, north,' Jack insisted. 'You're almost there. There couldn't be more than fifty yards separating us.'

'Yeah, well I think you and I must have different concepts of north, then,' she said craning her neck skyward.

'Why's that?'

'What do you see when you look south, Jack?'

'I dunno. Owen told me not to move my head.'

'Well, then you won't have noticed the great bloody cliff!'

'Oh, I was wondering where the breeze was coming from. Lucky I didn't fall off.'

'You'll be lucky we don't push you off when we find a way up there.'

'Sod that Suze, were calling in air rescue now. They can deal with him.'

'Wait, you're not leaving me here, are you?' Jack cried. He never did find whatever had been giving off the strange signal, and wasn't keen on hanging around in case it decided to show itself.

'Only for a little while,' Suzie replied. 'We'll see you back in Cardiff.'

'But how will they find me?'

'Oh don't worry,' she smirked. 'We'll tell them to just keep heading north.'