Torchwood: Fanfic: Down on the farm

[m_findlow]

Title: Down on the farm
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 923 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for prisca's prompt "Any, any, better don't put all your eggs in one basket" at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack learns a valuable life lesson

He'd been skeptical about Jack's choice of holiday destinations. Choosing the farmstay, which entailed four am starts didn't sound very much like a break from their busy work schedules. He pictured a holiday as lying around by the pool, soaking up the sunshine and thinking about nothing at all except perhaps what they might have for their next meal.

It had however turned out to be quite an enjoyable and relaxing experience, reinvigorating their enthusiasm for normal life. It was nice to get out in the fresh air and feel like they were doing something useful. It would almost be a shame to leave tomorrow after such an enjoyable week.

The farm was small, with just a handful of livestock, enough for their owners to make a living, but not much more. As such, everything was done by hand, and people staying on the farm were a big help in keeping on top of everything that needed doing.

Ianto had been apprehensive at first, when they'd been shown how to go about milking cows, but even though it was ridiculously early and still half dark, he found the rhythmic squeezing quite relaxing, able to let his minds drift away onto other thoughts whilst he worked, and ignoring the dribbles of warm milk that spilled over his hand.

After milking there was lucerne to pull and spread in the fields, giving their cows some alternative to the emerald green grass. After that, there'd be pigs to feed, chickens and geese, and one riled up turkey called Gerald. Later, they'd check on the small flock of sheep, lambing season in full swing. There'd be cuddling up to the tiny white balls of wool, all lanky limbs, wondering how it was that they learned to walk at such an early stage in their lives, and feeding them from bottles of formula, just like babies, and listening to their adorable little bleats of happiness.

This afternoon, the plan was to go and pick blackberries, so that they could be made into jam to be sold at the local market. The only difficulty would be in making sure Jack didn't eat them all first. He'd need to make sure there were enough left for jam to have with the hot crusty scones Mrs Beagle would bring out for afternoon tea.

They were just finishing up gathering the morning's eggs from the chicken shed, some of which would become breakfast for them, and the rest turned into freshly baked cakes and lemon curd. Ianto was looking forward to tucking into his gooey eggs and toast, and could already smell their hostess frying off thick rashers of farm smoked bacon, his mouth watering at the prospect.

He gathered up the two shallow baskets full of eggs and waited for Jack so they could make their way back to the house. Jack appeared out from under the chicken house, the odd stray feather clinging to his clothes. His own basket was piled high with eggs. For Jack, it was less about collecting the eggs than it was about making it a competition as to who could find the most.

'You should put some of those in the second basket,' Ianto said.

'Why?'

'Because it's too full.'

He looked at the baskets in each of Ianto's hands, each with about a dozen eggs, then looked at his own. His looked far more impressive.

'It's fine,' he said. 'Come on, I'm starving.'

'Haven't you ever heard of the saying "don't put all your eggs in one basket"?'

'You know, I never did understand that phrase.'

'It's about diversifying your risk.'

'Yeah, I know what it's trying to say, but what it has to do with eggs is a mystery. Did you know that there's not a single other planet in the universe that uses that saying? Every other saying on Earth I've heard, or has an alien an equivalent. A fool and his gold are soon parted, having a screw loose, pulling the wool over someone's eyes...'

'Don't count your chickens before they hatch,' Ianto added.

'Exactly. Nothing about eggs, and I should know beca-'

Jack didn't get to finish his sentence, before something zipped past his leg, tripping him up and sending him sprawling to the ground. When Ianto turned to look, he spotted the farm owner's black and white sheep dog, wagging his tail happily at their return.

Jack was in a state. Not only was his front covered in mud and stray bits of hay, but egg yolks as well. The overloaded basket of eggs had spilled everywhere, breaking all over him as he came crashing down on top of them. A few on the very bottom had been spared, tucked neatly into the little holes where they were meant to be set. The ones on top that had been sitting loose were now everywhere.

'Still don't understand what the saying means, Jack?' Ianto said, unable to stop himself grinning in amusement, despite the wasted eggs.

'You just love these I told you so moments, don't you?' Jack complained, dusting himself off as best he could, but knowing there'd be a shower and a change of clothes before he sat down to breakfast now. 'Stupid dog,' he said, but his heart wasn't in it as he said the words, watching that tail wagging, just happy to see them.

'Lucky we still have enough for breakfast,' Ianto replied, trying not to be too smug about. 'Mrs Beagle won't let you near her hen house again. You'll be relegated to mucking out stalls and brushing down horses.'

Comments

[bk_forever]

Oh Jack, haven't you learned yet that Ianto knows best? What a state to get in.