Torchwood: Fanfic: Pushing buttons

[m_findlow]

Title: Pushing buttons
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto, John Hart, Owen
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 801 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for badly_knitted's prompt "Any, any, I might have lost my temper... " at fic_promptly
Summary: A confrontation ends badly for a visitor to Torchwood.

Jack stepped up to the doorway of his office, peeking out.

'Ianto, my office for a minute?'

There was that quick little tug on the bottom of his waistcoat before he made his way across.

'Shut the door,' Jack said. He did so, coming to sit in the chair opposite Jack, Jack's own expression inscrutable.

'Is there something you want to tell me, Ianto?'

'No.' The reply was quick, but not too quick, even though Jack knew it was a lie.

'Are you sure?'

'Positive.'

'Okay, let me rephrase the question, then. Is there something you should tell me that you don't want to tell me?'

'Um, yes. But I suspect you already know.'

Jack leaned forward on the desk. 'John Hart didn't have a broken nose when I brought him in.'

'There's not much to amuse oneself with in the interrogation room,' Ianto replied.

'You think he did it to himself? Believe me, I know John, and there's only one thing he values more than his face.'

'I wasn't suggesting,'

'Ianto, I'm not mad. Just tell me what happened down there.'

Ianto leaned back in the chair, absently rubbing his thumb over the knuckles on his right hand. 'I... may have lost my temper.'

'You broke his nose?'

'It wasn't my first choice of parts I wanted to break.'

Jack chuckled. John would have misconstrued a hand going anywhere near there as interest. He shook his head. 'John is a serial button pusher. He gets his kicks from riling up patient people like you. It's a turn on. You're lucky you didn't end up pressed up against the wall with John's mouth wrapped around your,'

'Enough!'

Jack threw his hands up in surrender. 'All I'm saying is he's very persuasive.'

Ianto snorted. 'If you're desperate, maybe...'

'It's all just foreplay for him.'

'Yeah, well he got fistplay instead.'

Ianto couldn't even remember what the last thing was John had said to him that had made him snap. He'd only gone down there to bring water and a sandwich. John wasn't getting coffee. Not now. Not ever.

'Is this what you call hospitality?' John asked. 'Sweet goddesses, I've had better food in prison.'

'You're welcome to go back there,' Ianto replied.

'Oh, come now. Didn't you miss me, Eye Candy?'

'No.'

'I bet Jack did. Jack always misses me. He told me once that I was the best lover he'd ever had. I mean, Jack's impressive, don't get me wrong, but you haven't been impressed until you've had what I have to offer.'

Ianto let out a decisive little breath. 'I'll pass.'

'Hey, wait, is there dessert that comes with this, or are you the dessert? I always meant to ask Jack what flavour your candy cane was. Chocolate? Strawberry? Salted caramel?' he asked, leering salaciously.

Ianto rolled his eyes, trying hard not to blush.

John lounged back in the hard chair. 'Come on, Eye Candy. You know you want to check out my flavour. We've got everything we need here. Table and chair, very spartan and bondage. I like it. And then there's all those measurement markings on the wall. You could have me up against it, and we could take down my particulars. They're worth noting, trust me. No one quite believes it until they see it for themselves. Maybe I could take down yours?'

Ianto's stare was ice cold as he tightened his hand, trying to stay calm.

'You're so frigid!' John complained. 'It must be an absolute monster for Jack to be bothered with all the rest of your-'

Ah, yes, that's what he'd said, Ianto thought, grinning at the satisfying crunch sound John's face had made. He'd made his leave whilst John was still crying out obscenities, passing Owen along the way at the top of the stairs.

'John's had a little accident. Medically speaking, you should probably go check him.'

'Broken or just bleeding?' Owen asked, smirking.

Ianto showed him his hand, Owen checking it for damage. 'Broken, I think,' Ianto replied.

'Pity,' Owen said. 'He really should be more careful.'

'Couldn't agree more.'

'I've got some reports that need finishing,' Owen said.

'Do them first. He's an ex-Time Agent. I'm sure he's got a few emergency first aid skills.'

Jack shook his head again and stood up. Ianto followed suit.

'He's on our side,' Jack said. 'Well, mostly. Can you at least try to be nice?'

'I was being nice. He was getting sandwiches.'

'You know, a word of advice, Ianto? It's really not a good idea to get on his bad side.'

Ianto stepped up to him, their faces almost touching. 'It's really not a good idea to get on my bad side, either. Sir.'

Jack grinned, watching as Ianto slinked out of his office, still in a foul mood. Feisty lovers, Jack thought. He sure knew how to pick 'em.

Comments

[bk_forever]

John might know all kinds of fighting (and other) tricks, but I'd still bet on Ianto ;)

[mscatmoon.livejournal.com]

"Is there something you want to tell me? No." LOL. I love a feisty, snarky Ianto Jones. And he may *seem* mild mannered, but underneath... definitely not a good idea to get on his bad side, especially if it has to do with Jack.

[m-findlow.livejournal.com]

You don't ever want to get on Ianto's bad side! ;)