Torchwood: Fanfic: Denied

[m_findlow]

Title: Denied
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 738 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for merryghoul's prompt "Any, any, what's in that box?" (dialogue only fill) at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack loves surprises, until Ianto denies him.

'Ooh, what's in that box, my most handsome, sexy lover?'

'It's a surprise.'

'I love surprises! Who's it for?'

'You, actually.'

'Me? Even better. What is it?'

'Didn't I just mention it's a surprise, Jack?'

'Well, yeah, but I'm here now. Do we really have to wait any longer for you to make the big reveal to me?'

'Do you remember the last time I tried to surprise you?'

'Which time was that? I keep forgetting.'

'The time that you knew I was getting you a surprise gift for your birthday, but you didn't know when exactly I was going to go and pick it up, so you tried to secretly stalk me for days, snooping on my phone calls, hacking my emails, trying anything and everything you possibly could to ruin the surprise.'

'Be fair, Ianto. I don't have to hack your emails. I know the password.'

'That's hardly the point.'

'And, if you recall correctly, I never did find out what you were up to.'

'Only because I got a call from Owen at the hospital to come and help him collect two alien corpses and bring them back to the hub. Of course, you weren't to know that was completely staged, and that it gave me an excuse to leave the hub to pick up your present and leave it at home for you to find three days later.'

'I'm still not sure I like the idea of you doing personal business on company time.'

'You don't seem to have a problem with it when we're shagging in the supplies closet on a quiet afternoon.'

'That's different. That's me as your boss touching base with my employees.'

'Well, you were certainly touching something...'

'And now you're trying to get me off topic. If that box is for me, I don't see why I should have wait a second longer.'

'How about because your birthday isn't for another week, and you don't just randomly get presents at other times of the year.'

'Well, maybe I should.'

'Maybe. But then you wouldn't get anything for your birthday.'

'You know, I don't think I like this game anymore.'

'I didn't realise we were playing one.'

'We are. It's the "Ianto has a present for you but you can't have it" game.'

'I never said you couldn't have it. I just inferred you have to wait a few more days. If I didn't want you to have it, I wouldn't have bought it in the first place.'

'So, you admit you want me to have it?'

'Jack, can you stop trying to overcomplicate things? This is a box, inside which is a birthday present, which you are perfectly entitled to have on your birthday. Your birthday is next Tuesday, which means you will be allowed to open it on Tuesday. It's a surprise, because presents, by their very nature, are surprises right up until that moment you open them.'

'Why do I feel like you're treating me like a child?'

'Do you really want me to dignify that with an answer?'

'So, that's a no to getting a sneak peak?'

'Yes, that's a no. This box is going into the archives, somewhere you'll never find it.'

'Only because you made the filing system around here so ridiculously complicated that no one but you can follow it.'

'Which is just how I like it. If you can't follow it, you can't come down there and mess things up.'

'That's just you being a meanie.'

'If I'm a meanie, then why would I buy you a present?'

'So that you can tell me you bought me a present and that I can't have it.'

'Jack, don't be so petulant.'

'I'm not being petulant!'

'Yeah, you are.'

'Well, uh, bite me then, Ianto!'

'I could.'

'Sorry?'

'I could bite you. Or I could nibble. Maybe a little bit of licking and sucking as well, if you like. There's actually lots of things I could do with my mouth that might make you forget all about this silly box.'

'Oh, well, perhaps in that case I could be convinced to have my attention diverted for just a little while. Or a long while.'

'I didn't have any plans tonight.'

'I was thinking maybe a little sooner than tonight. Maybe like right now?'

'Depends on the boss's schedule, I suppose.'

'I hear he's clear for the rest of the day.'

'Lucky him.'

'Lucky indeed.'

Comments

[bk_forever]

Jack seems to have double standards - personal business is fine when he's personally involved.

*giggles* Jack sounds like he's cross-examining Ianto in court! Not that it does him any good present wise, but I think he's going to enjoy being distracted.

[m-findlow.livejournal.com]

Jack have double standards? Never! Lol.
Ianto is well versed in Jack's interrogation methods and can infuriate him with countless logical arguments, but distraction is the easier option, which both of them will at least enjoy. ;)