Torchwood: Fanfic: All dressed up

[m_findlow]

Title: All dressed up
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto  
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 1,163 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for juliet316's prompt "Any, any, the one night of year where you dress up as somebody completely different" at fic_promptly
Summary: Jack is taking charge of costumes for Halloween this year.

'What are we doing, Jack?' Ianto asked, Jack's hand gripped firmly around his own as he dragged Ianto down into the depths of the hub. 'Where are you even taking us?'

'We're going to pick out Halloween costumes. All my stuff is stored down here.'

'All your...' Ianto let his sentence trail off. Of course Jack would have a collection of costumes tucked away somewhere. There were dozens of locked storerooms down here with all manner of things tucked away in their confines. Jack had lived a long time, and even though he claimed he traveled light and never hoarded personal effects, he was bound to have a whole bunch of stuff he couldn't bear to part with. Party costumes were just so very Jack.

'I thought we said we didn't have time for all of this? Trick or treating is for kids.' Not that he didn't consider Jack to be the biggest kid he'd ever met.

'That's where you're wrong, Ianto Jones,' he said, coming to stop in front of an unprepossessing door. 'Halloween is the best holiday there is.'

'You say that about Christmas and Easter too.' Though Ianto suspected it had something to do with the food. Bank holidays and the Queen's birthday didn't get so much as a look in.

Jack threw him a smile as he slid his access card into the small swipe reader on the side of the door, hearing it beep happily at him. 'I've already got ideas as to what we should go as,' Jack said, wandering confidently into the room and opening up a large box full of clothes covered in plastic dry cleaners covers. He rifled for a minute before finding what he wanted, pulling it out and letting it hang reverently from its coat hanger.

'Dear lord,' Ianto thought, taking in the long evening gown. It was head to toe gold sequins with rather generous padded cleavage built into the bodice.

Jack beamed with unadulterated joy. 'What do you think?'

'It's very, uh... Shirley Bassey,' he said, trying to find words that wouldn't offend.

'It's great, huh? I asked Shirley if I could borrow a few of her signature pieces but she's as much a hoarder as anyone I've ever met. She wasn't going to part with even a single one of them.'

'You must have been gutted,' Ianto said, keeping his expression neutral. Of course there had to be a Shirley Bassey story in the somewhere. How could Jack have lived in Wales all these years and not have one?

'I had to get this one customer made based on a similar design. Plus she's about two feet shorter than me, even in five inch heels. Oh, now where did I put those?' Jack asked himself, surveying the room for the matching accessories.

'Do you mind if I?' Ianto asked, requesting permission before he started pawing through the box, his curiosity overbrimming at what other insane frocks Jack was keeping down here. Some voyeuristic part of him just couldn't resist.

'Knock yourself out. If you see something you like, go for it.'

'I don't think so,' Ianto replied. Jack was outrageous and mad and, though Ianto didn't like to admit it, quite possibly just as stunningly gorgeous in a dress as he was his usual more male oriented garb. It just wasn't Ianto's cup of tea.

Jack paused mid-search and turned to look at him. 'Oh,' he said, sounding disappointed.

Ianto narrowed his own eyes at Jack. 'Oh, what?'

'Well, I was kinda hoping you'd dress up with me.'

Ianto founds Jack's furtive tone perplexing. 'That was that plan. What did you have in mind? Pirate? Zombie? Astronaut? Vampire?' Please say vampire, he thought.

There was a beat ' Um...'

Ianto knew that awkward pause preceded something he wasn't going to like. 'What?'

'I was thinking this,' Jack said, slowly pulling out a short black and red number with lots of kinky ribbon and lace.

'What is that?'

'Betty Boop. It's your colour. And it'll work great with your slim figure as the dress does all the work to gives you curves in all the right places. She's even got the same cute button nose as you.'

'I do not have a cute button nose!' He gave a weary sigh. 'I don't wear dresses. I'm all for Halloween but...'

'You wore them when you got transformed into a woman, remember?' Jack said, gripping the dress to his chest protectively, as if Ianto might tear it from his hands.

'I never worse dresses.' Ill-fitting pencil skirts and matching suit jackets, yes, but he'd be damned if he was going around in a summer frock. It had honestly been the hardest five days of his life. Who knew being a woman was so hard.

'It's Halloween,' Jack insisted. 'You're allowed to dress up however you like.'

Ianto felt like underscoring the part of Jack's reply that specified he had to like it.

'It's just a bit of fun, Ianto,' Jack said, still tying to wear him down. 'Pair it up with some fishnets and you won't even have to wax your legs.'

Oh, yes, because he was definitely going to agree to having the hair ripped from his legs. 'How thoughtful of you,' he replied, deadpan.  

'Please say yes.' Jack turned on a puppy dog look to rival any he'd ever given before. He certainly needed to if he thought they were both going to wander around as women dressed in suggestive costumes.

Ianto frowned at the hideously short dress. 'I'll look ridiculous.'

'You'll look amazing. Besides, you know I think you look amazing no matter what you wear. No one will even know who we are. What's the harm in dragging it up for one night? It'll be fun.'

Jack was crazy. Completely mad and crazy. Then again, it was just one night and they'd be out with all the other crazies. What was the worst that could possibly happen? Plus Jack would owe him massively after this. A night of being forced to get around in a wig and platform peep toe shoes, letting Jack putting makeup on his face and feeling like mutton done up as lamb was worth a dozen regular favours. It was always good to have favours in the bank. He wouldn't admit that he'd enjoy admiring Jack's legs, noticing only just now that the gold sequined number he'd selected forhimself had a split that ran all the way almost up to his hip bone.

And there was always a good chance that the rift would play up on Halloween. If it was going pass itself off as normal, what better opportunity than a night when everyone was dressed up as aliens and ghouls? He could he spared yet. That or be forced to chase around town with a dress in that was barely going to cover his arse. If that didn't make the aliens high tail it out of here in a hurry, nothing would.

Comments

[bk_forever]

Dare to dress up, Ianto! You know you want to! Ianto Boop *grins*