Torchwood-fest - Christmas greetings

[m_findlow]

Title: Christmas greetings
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 892 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for Prompt - Card at torchwood_fest
Summary: Ianto has all of Jack's greeting cards needs well organised.

'Watcha doing?' Jack asked, seeing Ianto busily working away, hunched over his desk with a pile of rather small looking papers. There was something hypnotic about watching Ianto working so intensely on something. 'I thought you'd finished all of your reports,' he added, before frowning at his next thought. 'Don't tell me the others are giving you theirs to proof read again.'

Ianto stopped and looked up at him, letting the nib of the expensive looking pen remain poised just over the paper. 'Trust me, my proof reading days are well behind me. Everyone can take responsibility for their own paperwork, present company excluded, of course.'

'Of course,' Jack agreed. Jack needed his expert eye over his own correspondence to give them just the right amount of diplomacy, and to remove any extraneous references to Torchwood always knowing what was best. 'So, if your reports are done and you're not doing anyone else's, then what's all this?'

Ianto held up one of the small cards, showing Jack the front. 'It's our Christmas cards.'

Jack took it from his hand and studied the card and its message. 'Warmest wishes for the festive season from the team at Torchwood Cardiff? Since when do we do Christmas cards? And more to the point, to whom are we sending them? We're meant to be a secret organisation.'

Ianto snorted at the comment. 'With you at the helm, nothing about Torchwood Cardiff is a secret. It's practically wrapped up in neon lights and dancing across the stage in a glittery suit.'

'Hmph,' Jack muttered, taking offense at Ianto's suggestion that he was the sole reason everybody in Cardiff seemed to know about Torchwood. 'You still didn't answer my question. How can we have people of our Christmas card list? Wouldn't that be like two cards?' Even that was probably being generous.

'On the contrary,' Ianto replied, 'we've got loads of people on our list. There's the Queen and Prince Philip at the top of the list naturally, but there's Martha and Tom, Archie up at Torchwood Two, Sergeant Andy Davidson, Detective Swanson, Idris at the mayor's office, two dozen people we regularly liaise with at UNIT, Bridget from the Home Office...'

'Hold up,' Jack said, throwing his hand up to halt Ianto's response. 'We send a card to Bridget? As in Bridget Spears? That woman hates our guts.'

'She dislikes Torchwood,' Ianto clarified. 'In fact, she did make the comment once that were it not for the fact that you were the head of Torchwood, and therefore the proverbial and literal thorn in the side of her boss, and that in an alternate reality whereby we didn't have to work with one another, she might confess to finding you slightly charming.' Ianto let a tiny smirk play across his face as he waited for Jack's reaction to the comment.

Jack stood up straighter at the comment. 'She thinks I'm charming?'

'There were several other caveats she may have mentioned before coming to that conclusion, but I opted for brevity.' Jack could tell from Ianto's tone that there was likely something about them being the last two people left alive on Earth before Bridget admitted to that, but Ianto had wisely decided to keep that part to himself. He knew Jack was unlikely to take it in the spirit it was intended, which was to say it was a joke. Bridget had the driest sense of humor of anyone Jack had ever met, and nothing he'd done so far in their long and rocky relationship had gone any way towards ingratiating himself towards her.  

'Well,' Jack said, taking in the piles of neatly competed cards and the envelopes that had been addressed in Ianto's finest penmanship, complete with Christmas themed postage, 'I can see that you appear to have the whole Christmas card thing well in hand here. Don't let me keep you.'

'Actually, you're just in time,' Ianto replied. 'This pile here,' he said, pointing to a stack that looked about three dozen cards tall, are all the ones ready for you to add your signature and any other personal greetings.'

Jack groaned as he spotted the second pile that were yet to be completed, which looked even taller than the pile ready to go. 'Seriously?' There had to be at least fifty more cards. He was certain they didn't even know that many people. Were they sending cards to everybody they'd retconned this year?

'Tis better to give than to receive, Jack,' Ianto quoted him. 'I bought you a nice new fountain pen for the occasion,' he said holding out a box with a very fine golden pen laid inside, inscribed delicately with his own name along the side in cursive script.

'Lucky me,' Jack said, sounding thoroughly unenthused at the prospect, despite the bribery gift. However lovely it was, it wasn't going to make the process any less pleasant.

'Just think of it as sowing the seeds of kindness and goodwill, so that you'll reap the benefits all year long.'

'What happened to my being charming?'

'Charm will only get you so far, as we both well know. Now, start warming up that wrist of yours. I know you've got the stamina in it when it suits you.'

Jack groaned, picking up the first pile of cards. Kindness and goodwill had never looked so unappealing.

Comments

[bk_forever]

Poor Jack, although I sympathise. I dread writing cards because I can never think what to write.

[jo02]

You need an Ianto to write out all your cards for you so you only have to sign your name :)

[bk_forever]

It would be a big help!

[jo02]

You know, it's kinda sad that Jack still hasn't cottoned on that Ianto does actually run the place ...

Just tell me that he didn't put return addresses on the envelopes :)