Anythingdrabble Challenge 165 - Stuck in the stone age

[m_findlow]

Title: Stuck in the stone age
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: Jack, Ianto
Word Count: 500 words
Rating: PG
Notes: Written for Challenge 165 - Digital at anythingdrabble
Summary: Ianto finally thinks they're on top of things, but Jack's about to throw a spanner in the works.

‘You're in a chipper mood today,’ Jack observed, waltzing into Ianto's office and seeing his husband with a pleased look on his face and a desk devoid of a single sheet of paper.

‘I am, actually,’ Ianto agreed.

‘You're also late,’ Jack added, checking his watch and noting that it was past eleven. ‘Some top secret meeting at Whitehall this morning you forgot to tell me about?’

‘I was out at breakfast.’

Jack's eyebrows disappeared into his fringe. ‘Breakfast? How come I wasn't invited?’ If he'd known breakfast was in the cards he wouldn't have gotten up so early, rushed down a bowl of cornflakes and headed to the hub.

‘It was a breakfast to reward an employee for reaching a significant milestone.’

Jack leaned his hip against the desk. ‘Oh? Who?’

‘Penny. Last week marked the completion of Torchwood's biggest ever project.’

Jack felt confused. ‘Biggest project?’ As second in command he should definitely know what that was but he was drawing a blank.

‘The digitizing of every last scrap of data Torchwood has worldwide. Mission files, research papers, photographs, lithographs, microfiche, tape recordings, everything. All logged, indexed, tagged, and filed for immediate computer retrieval at any moment anywhere in the world. When I started this fifteen years ago I didn't think we would ever get there, so it only seemed right to celebrate with the person who took over the mantle and got the job finished. A new fully digital age for Torchwood.’

‘That's great.’

Ianto narrowed his eyes at Jack. ‘So, why do you sound so unexcited?’

Jack scuffed his boot on the floor, studying it. ‘It's just… um, maybe that's not quite all of it. I might have kept some stuff.’

Ianto's displeased look deepened. ‘What do you mean you kept some stuff?’

‘I always meant to bring it all back one day, I just… It was the kind of stuff I didn't really want Torchwood having access to. You know how they were. They never even noticed it going missing. I only one ever stole one box at a time. I destroyed most of the originals but I kept all my own notes for future reference. Some of their research was controversial even by today's standards.’

Ianto pinched the bridge of his nose. ‘Exactly how much stuff did you steal and where is it now?’

‘Oh, it's only a few warehouses up in Merthyr. I mean, they're big warehouses but there's probably only, oh, five or six of them?’

‘Great. Brilliant. If you weren't immortal I might kill you. Do you know how hard it is for our optical character recognition software to read your handwriting? Cursive script is a nightmare!’

Jack scowled. ‘It was how they wrote in the nineteenth century! We didn't have computers. We had to write everything by hand. And I've never heard you complain about it before.’

Ianto sighed. ‘It is beautiful handwriting, but to convert it to digital print? Better add another five years. Penny will be devastated.’

‘Sorry.’