Fffc Bingo Card - A real lemon

[m_findlow]

Title: A real lemon 
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Owen 
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 1,000 words
Content notes: none 
Author notes: Written for Bingo Card Prompt 72 - Lemon at fffc
Summary: Ianto's new wheels are getting a test drive. 

'Right,' Jack announced, putting to an end any hopes Ianto had about today being a quiet and uneventful day. 'Tosh reports we've got some strange readings coming from the Merthyr Tydfil area so I need two volunteers to go and check it out.' 

Ianto looked across at Gwen's empty desk, still busy chasing up an item that was believed to have been stowed away in police lockup when they'd arrested a lady she'd been following for nearly a week now. Tosh was also noticeably absent, having made her reports to Jack and then proceeding downstairs to complete maintenance on their several systems. He looked at Owen who was leaning his hand on the desk with an annoyed look on his face, and then back at Jack. Volunteers wasn't the right word for it when there were only the two of them left. 

'I guess that'd be us,' Ianto said. 

'Thanks for putting up your hand,' Jack said, even as Owen was rolling his eyes. 'Get out there and see what you can find out. Report back asap and let us know if you need any backup.' 

Owen tugged off his lab coat, exchanging it for his leather jacket even as Ianto was slipping his own woolen overcoat over his arm. It wasn't going to be warm out in Merthyr, he knew that much. 

' You'd better not whinge about the legroom again,' Owen warned him, reminding Ianto that he complained every time he had to get into Owen's sports car. For what it must have cost him, it wasn't very comfortable. And it would be even less comfortable on a long trip and with his still healing back injury. 

'I was thinking we could take my car,' Ianto offered. 

'Your car? I didn't think you had one anymore.' 

'I got a new one. Couldn't exactly just keep going along without one.' 

Owen accepted the explanation with barely a shrug. 'Huh. How come I haven't seen it, then?' 

'Because I parked it several spots away so careless people like you didn't throw open their doors and dent the side or scratch the paintwork.' 

'Oh, you're one of those people,' Owen said. 

'What people?' 

'The kind that fuss over their new car for months.' 

'I'd just like it to stay new looking for more than five minutes.' 

Owen smiled. 'That's why you haven't let Jack give it a test drive yet?' 

'That's why Jack is never getting a test drive.' 

The SUV could put up with Jack's thrashing and sharp wheel turns, but the average sedan was not nearly as robust. He should know. The last one he'd owned had suffered from his own brand of Jack Harkness driving, trying to ditch the crazy nutter from that cult who'd been hell bent on driving him right off the road and over the side of the mountain - which ultimately they'd succeeded in, after a good many attempts by Ianto to employ every defensive driving skill he had to lose them. Memories of it still haunted him and it had taken a while before he'd felt safe getting behind the wheel again, preferring to walk and take taxis for several weeks afterward. Not that he'd been medically cleared to drive, and his back still twinged every now and then when he was sitting. Walking had been the best thing for his rehabilitation. Having it as an excuse not to put himself back in charge of a vehicle was just a bonus. 

Now however was as good a time as any to finally dispel any residual reservations he had. A nice long drive down into the valleys was just what he needed to confront that scene again in a safe way and move on. 

Ianto pressed the key fob and they were soon on their way. 

If Owen was impressed by any of the car’s features, he didn't show it. It was meant to be the same as Ianto's old car, but there were noticeably more extras in this one that he couldn't justify paying for with his old one. 

They were well into the winding mountain roads when the engine started making strange noises. Ianto slowed it down a little but the noise persisted until the car’s engine finally gave up and he pulled it over to the side of the narrow road. 

'You out of petrol?' Owen asked. 

Ianto shook his head. 'Still three quarters of a tank. I filled it yesterday.' He tried starting it again but got no response. 'How can we be broken down? It's a brand new car.' 

Owen folded his arms. 'Ianto mate, I hate to say it but you got yourself a lemon.' 

'Well, technically I didn't buy it. Jack did.' 

Owen's eyebrows flew up. 'He bought you a new car?' 

'Well, my other one did get written off after it went flying off the side of a mountain with me still in it, if you recall.'

Owen scoffed in disbelief. 'He buys you a new car and he won't even shout me a coffee. Tight arse.' 

'I think he felt a little guilty about how it happened. And I'm sure if you totalled your car in the line of duty, he'd replace it too.' He wasn't sure Jack would, but he'd felt so guilty about what had happened that he'd foisted the car on Ianto and demanded that he not speak about it again. It was the least he could do, he insisted. 

'Typical Jack,' Owen muttered. 'Bet the dealer saw him coming a mile away. Dumb schmuck.' 

'I'm sure it wasn't like that.' The last thing Jack would have wanted would be for Ianto to end up with a dud car. 

Owen got out, walked around it, popped the hood and then sighed. 'Well, Jack did call to say if we needed backup. I think this counts, don't you?' 

Ianto looked sadly at his shiny new car. Abandoned on a lonely road in the middle of nowhere. From now on, he wasn't leaving the city limits.