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Title: Holding out for a hero
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Characters: Ianto/Jack, The Doctor (Twelve)
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 500 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for Challenge 486 - Champion at slashthedrabble
Summary: Jack has gotten himself into trouble again, and now Ianto has to bail him out.
Ianto watched on helplessly as the local townsfolk grabbed Jack and hauled him away. From the looks of things, they weren't dragging him away to be worshipped as some kind of God. This was definitely the bad kind of being taken away.
He spun and faced the Doctor. 'What the hell just happened?' One second he'd been buying strange fruits from a market stall, using only hand signals to trade currency for quantity and the next thing he'd turned around to find Jack in an altercation.
The Doctor spoke quietly to a fellow stallholder in some gibberish that seemed to pass for language around these parts. Ianto was the only one who wasn't party to the translation. Apparently this was the TARDIS's way of forcing him to learn new languages from scratch, rather than translate everything for him. Right now, he wished she wasn't being so stubborn.
'Doctor, what did he say?'
The Doctor pulled off his sunglasses and gave a sigh. 'Something he shouldn't have, of course. It wouldn't be Jack otherwise, would it? Can't go anywhere and just buy fruit, can we? Probably something inappropriate about bananas.'
Ianto looked worried. 'They're not going to hurt him, are they?'
'Oh, no. They've just arrested him. There'll be a trial in the morning. He's going to need a champion to stand for him.'
Arrested. Again. One of these days he was going to have to teach Jack to shut his big mouth. He paused. 'Hang on, did you just say he needs a champion?'
'That's what I was just told. Seems to be the custom around here. A representative if you will, to serve to offender's interests at trial. Hope you don't mind I already told him that was you.'
'What? Me? And what exactly does this champion have to do?'
'Well, I don't know!' The Doctor replied. 'Just because I speak the language doesn't mean I know the customs of every planet in the known universe. It might be a legal trial, a game of checkers, a sword fight, or an egg and spoon race for all I know.'
'So, what you're saying is that this could be like one of those medieval fight to the death kind of things. The winner gets to live and is exonerated?'
'Anything's possible.'
'Great. And why do I have to be his champion? Why can't you help him out? You're the one that can speak the damn language!'
The Doctor put his hands on his hips. 'He's not my responsibility. He's your husband! He's like a dog that needs a leash. Or to be spayed. I thought you'd have him better trained by now.'
Ianto sighed. He would have liked to think so too, yet no matter how he tried, Jack always found new ways of getting into trouble. 'Fine,' he grumbled. 'I'm his bloody champion, then.'
It was lucky neither of them could die. Not permanently anyway, because if Ianto survived this so-called trial tomorrow, he was going to kill Jack.
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Date: 2018-04-28 09:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 09:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 10:11 am (UTC)So, sequel?
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Date: 2018-04-29 11:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 04:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2018-04-29 09:06 pm (UTC)I'm freaking out because this week is contest week and I've also signed up to do a Torchwood Gerald & Harriet fic for who_guestfest which is due 10th May. My fic is already 8k and only halfway done but I wont be able to come back to it until the 8th after contest week is over. Plus the other six comms I write for weekly and fffc has decided that this month's special is a prompt every day all month! Still got to write my Tw100 fills today.
I have no idea how I'm meant to get all this done and hold down my job! Argh! :s
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Date: 2018-04-29 09:27 pm (UTC)You really do have a lot on your plate! I thought I was swamped, but you have me beat. Good luck with it all!
I saw the fffc challenge and just went, "Um, no can do." Very bad timing, clashing with Contest Week. Plus my sister was making noises about visiting this week and I still don't know one way or the other. Hoping she won't because I hate having my favourite writing challenge interrupted.
I got two 49 prompt tables from one_sentence_only, and I've only just finished the first one. I plan to post the sentences and let people request to have any they like expanded into full fics.
I did manage to cross two requests off my list this week by combining them for my btbd amnesty piece. But I've added three more, so not quite so great an achievement. One of them is a Doctor Who fic I'm hashing out details on that was requested over at ff.net - not sure the recipient will be entirely happy as she wants female aliens and I see them as male, but ho hum...
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Date: 2018-05-01 09:17 am (UTC)I stopped keeping an official list, but I have started comments in my inbox for ideas / suggestions plus another mental list in my head. A physical list would just be too depressing! Bad enough my temporary writing file has about eighty pages of snippets for things I've started and never finished.
Best of luck for the week ahead, it's probably the only time I'll have to chat along the way until it's all over! ;)
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Date: 2018-05-01 03:42 pm (UTC)I have notes all over the place, I need to start flipping through them whenever a new challenge is posted to see if I've got anything requested that fits.
Good luck this week, see you at the finish line! I'll be rooting for you to win!